It just occurred to me that like your life’s purpose (not that it needs to be specifically stated), which may present itself in different forms throughout your life (you can share the same values as a teacher, business person, or engineer, or so I believe), so to does love present itself different.
Love is patient and kind; love is in the smile I give to the baby in the carriage I see on the street, the same smile I’ll give to my own children; love is in the time I am single, waiting patiently for the right person and developing my self, knowing that I can’t have real love with just anyone.
Perhaps most of all, love is in the time we give ourselves to find it, recognize it, cultivate and cherish it. Also preserve it.
Love will wear a certain face and come at a certain time, but this is just one facet of love. The one is brought to you through the collisions of millions of stars and many twists of fate; your own child is the baby you see on the street before it is the seedling in your womb.
Is the love of a man, the love of a man to have children with, and the love of a child the same? No, of course not- and one is not a means to an end. Yet somehow, if we are lucky, we find someone who unites all the qualities we want to give to our children yet unborn, and the ones we need for ourselves right now, and can share our dreams for the life yet to come. All while being here, being full of life and love and hope and warmth, the sheer warmth of intimacy, human kindness, passion, friendship.
I personally often associate love with risk. This is certainly so and for good reason. To love someone is to stake a huge part of your happiness on them. Though you remain independent to the extent that you can always pick yourself up and live and love again, and hopefully you retain your own interests and self respect, to love is to be vulnerable. You can’t be autonomous and committed to someone else, you can’t love without the potential for being hurt. When you build a life with someone, you base a lot off of them.
But haste makes waste. There is a big difference between intelligent, calculated, acceptable risks you take after long reflection, and the risks you take in hope of a quick return. There is growing a company, and playing the stock market. There is rationalizing your chances for happiness and feeling like, What the hell? Might as well give it a chance, and LOVINg someone, right now, come what may, and planning to love them in the future- maybe even forever.
Can you love someone if you don’t want to posess them? If you aren’t ready to be posessed- but I am, I’m just freaked out at the idea of it-? Caan you love without knowinf if its going to last…
This I don’t know, but I believe yes.
Love happens in the moment, and no amount of happy memories or grand visions of the future can make love. is love strengthened by those things? Certainly. But as love takes root, slowly takes hold, perhaps it is a little blind. You don’t notice the acorn as it grows into a giant oak, at least on a day by day basis. Maybe you don’t even notice the day that out of all the opportunities for love that have come your way, one has found its way into the right soil. The day that everything is possible and life is new, so new it is sjust potential, just waiting in the seed.
I don’t know all the names of love or of God, but I can say patience is one of them.
Let time do its work, and wait for the right moment. This is love, though we don’t know how it will reveal itself yet. Is it the quest or the Grail itself? Does the journey ever end- not really. Love is a prize, but it is not a destination. It is a state of mind that can be ever present, ever fruitful, but it is not under our control how it will reveal itself. All we can do is know that it is in the fertile ground lying fallow, ever present even if we are waiting for him to show up, or not sure if he’s the one, yet.