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When we walk to the edge of all the light we have and take the step into the darkness of the unknown,we must believe that one of two things will happen.
There will be something solid for us to stand on or we will be taught to fly.- Patrick Overton

This is what being in a relationship (or budding love connection), looking for a job, and in general, a meaningful life is.

Courage is saying “I love you,” first.  Even if those aren’t exactly the words that are said.

“Getting to know someone,” daring to maybe love them (and hope for their love in return), is just throwing down the gauntlet, over and over again.

You can just wait for the phone to play some mindgames and reduce your risk, could just marry someone you know is too crazy about you since you are the “better half,”  you could just wait for love to fall out of the sky.

But don’t, because your angel is waiting here for you, walking around on the ground.

And every rejection, every coeur brise, every clin d’oeil, every ill-considered romp, every rom com’s potentially unhealthy message, every time you look at your parents and hopefully see how much they love each other, are all leading you down a path.

Some things, like saying your prayers, loving your family, and being your authentic self are leading you towards that path a little saner, safer, healthier, and possibly, more directly.

Whatever twists and turns life takes, don’t forget it’s in your hands, you can with your will, with your hope and twist and daring, lead it someone.

So yeah, I just sent two sweet texts, haven’t heard back yet.

I’m afraid, thinking of all the rejection of yore and the unhealthy patterns of yesteryear in college recalled by seeing my old friends (“friends”), wondering whether it’s the right moment. Not so worried about whether I’m too romantic, tall, fat, smart, mobile at least.  This is my real life- this is a life I believe in living, and anyone who really loves me will understand that.

And hopefully respond back promptly.

But who knows- cell phone battery could be dead, dude could be busy, might not have heard it, or maybe, it’s just not right.

Time will tell, that is the only certainty.

I hope it will say, “I love you.”

Peace and gros bisous,

MJ

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