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Constraints are liberating.- My design professor

Anxiety is the dizziness of freedom- Soren Kierkegaard

Like waves crashing into the shore, my life sometimes seems like a combination between seeking solidity and rushing away from it. When I hit land, and commitment, I beat at the bars of my cage like a crazed bird, but when I am off to sea or flying proudly in the dome above I want nothing more than commitment. All I want are walls, boundaries, borders, commitments when in the sky/sea and feeling alone, and once I’m there, I just rail against structure, order, predictability, conformity, and question the choice I made to keep a part of me locked up. And when I begin to recognize the urge to flee before the key is turned to secure the lock, I guilt myself into it and believe there’s something wrong with wanting to be free. But freedom feels so lonely, especailly since most of mankind wants nothing to do with casting off their self imposed chains, and what’s more, you wonder if any ties can last if people are truly, absolutely, utterly free.

I tend to favor freedom though.

I tend not to like any sort of restriction, and I’ve been told I’m afraid of commitment.

When it comes down to it, the limitless possibilities of life should be a source of wonder, not fear.

There is no need for cages in order to find safety if you have faith. You don’t need to predict the future if you are comfortable with being fully present.

Everyone likes to tell themselves all kinds of lies about how X must lead to Y. But the truth is that there’s any number of paths, to happiness or unhappiness.  And there’s more than one way to get to the same place.

We put ourselves into many cages, things we know won’t work, in order to limit our options, frustrate our potential to make the future more predictable.

But one day you will break this cage as you have many others.

And one day all of us will be freed from even our mortal bonds.

So, in the time that you have, life well. Don’t go searching for a cage when you really want to feel commitment. Don’t do anything because you don’t think you have an alternative.

Sure, life is important, and sometiems you need to compromise.

But don’t go looking for a compromise, before you have seen with your bird’s eyes all that lies within and ahead of you.

Go confidently in the direction of your dreams! Live the life you’ve imagined. As you simplify your life, the laws of the universe will be simpler.

Henry David Thoreau

Good luck!

MJ

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