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I am overweight because I have eaten more than my body needed to maintain itself at a healthy weight given my amount of exercise. I ate a lot of junk food and I didn’t exercise enough. I stressed out all the time and used food as a way to cope.

I stopped following the rules of eating to see if I could still love myself with more weight, and if my food addiction was still there. It was.  But I’m about to conquer it, with the power of unconditional love and the simple desire to be healthy.

Many aspects of my current habits will have to be let go.

As far as defining overweight, that’s always a little sticky for me. According to BMI charts even when I’ve felt I’ve found my happy weight, though not quite resembling a model and still having plenty of curves to go around, I am overweight, or within the high end of a healthy weight. That’s fine.

I want to fit into my clothes. I want to feel strong and confident and finally be “naturally” thin by eating to fuel my body and not to comfort my over active mind, and choosing foods that reflect a commitment to nurturing myself, not ones that drug me with temporary pleasure but ultimately lead to dis ease and addiction.

There’s a reason you can’t put down that potato chip or oreo. Food can be a powerful addiction- recently read about mice that were found oreos more addictive than heroin.

ALso read about some mice, or maybe it was rats, that didn’t become addictive because they were living the rat dream life in a stimulating environment rather than being bored to death and seeking highs rather than being happy with their lives.

Much of my overweight has to do with environment, with habits, with cues. With a bout of existential depression, with using food asa way to cope during a tough time in my life, with denial over the real cause, confusion over the best way to return to health, and be truly healthy so that I don’t face this problem next time, and most importantly, just giving it the time and effort and a fair shot.

In  a few weeks, I’ll write another post: Why I am Healthy. And I will be grateful for all the factors that will have enabled me to achieve a healthy lifestyle, mindset, and body.

Why am I becoming healthy? Because I am letting all that extra weight, stress, worry, fear, and tension go, and choosing to be happy, present, and to self-nurturing.

Namaste,

MJ

 

 

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