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All the mess and fuss and grand adventure of love and life.

that someone, who I would have to make compromises for, whom I could never really control, who would change me.

Who would inevitably disappoint me, who would be a superman I”d never get over but who sometimes I would have to save.

So I think that’s what I would like my next grand adventure to be. I don’t expect love will bring me fulfillment;
I don’t expet perfect bliss;
I do expect to feel alive.
And I do want someone to share those moments with.

Perhaps not all, but some.

Not to avoid the pain of being alone, but to enjoy the company of someone who gives me more joy than any sacrifice or compromise I might make for him, someone who will make me feel alive, and I will in a very real way give my life to;

not because my life is not already full, but because joy is doubled when shared while sorrow is halved.

For the mystery, for the tumult, the loss of control, the rebirth.

just to engage in the full beauty and terror of life, to not be afraid to climb up the mountain and encounter the terrible visage of God, present among us, visible only to those with eyes to see and guts to feel, and hearts ripe to break open.