The road doesn’t end here. It never does.
I followed my bliss and got here. According to my standard of wanting to live in Paris and have a great job, I have succeeded. I am living the life I choose.
But this isn’t the end of the road. I do want to get French citizenship, but more importantly, I want to travel. A lot. And write.
I miss being a teacher.
I think my life needs to change.
And yes, I want a family. I want to fall in love and have a baby.
I want to have the balls to love someone regardless of whether it will be forever or not.
It’s time to move again from comfort and satisfaction to a new challenge.
And this challenge hasn’t entirely taken form.
I hope to take a new job soon, and I do like my corporate job and my vacation time.
It is great. There is nothing wrong with it. I deserve to enjoy my success.
And I would like to get a chance to be a producer in the business world, and not only a performer. I want a chance to lead, innovate and transform.
but even more than that, I want to have the wherewithal to work away, and a blank canvas to create.
Yes, I want both. It doesn’t all have to be either/or.
And whatever I do, there will always be a path that I didn’t take. And the choice of right vs wrong is rarely simply binary.
I think that’s been my biggest and most troubling dscovery these past years.
I am both a hero and a storyteller, and a good listener.
And all my family just wants me to be safe and well taken care of.
But my heart yearns for adventure. My story is one of choosing truth over comfort, every time.
It is also one of being adaptable and keeping an open mind and open heart.
I want to work in a place where it doesn’t matter if I have tattoos and big opinions.
I don’t want false security. I want authenticity, belonging, to be valued for who I am.
I want to start my travel blog and post my pictures.
I want to do the backoffice administrative stuff to make my life here easier and better.
I want to take care of my body so I can be a better adventurer and feel more peace in my journey here on earth.
I want to be happpy with who I am.
I want to name the demonds of caring what other people think and believing I have no value besides what the world ascribes to me.
I want to disobey my family or at least the chorus of voice sin my hea dthat claim to speak of them and dare to be loved for myself alone.
I dare to love someone and make a committment and have child without accepting it as a lifelong tether to a life that is stale and not what I want anymore.
I dare to love myself enough to do all this.
I dare to take it slow and easy on myself and ot make steady progress.
I chdare to change my life right away in accordance with the wisdom of my heart.
I dar eto be.